|| Too many fucking cigarettes.
I fucking hate how my sloppy typing can make me reload the page and lose an entire entry. ANd you know what? I'm tired of hittng backspace, and my tpying is ugly tonight, so... sorry.
No, I'm not drunk, just sitting funny and it's impairing my typing. Plus I typed all of this already.
So I guess we came to an agreement one day where boys and girls can be in love with someone and also have their "celebrity crush". I must've been asleep that day. Figures. We've established that girls will overlook those tasteless huge posters of improbably proportioned girls and calendars that are merely porn that you turn the page to it every 30 days. Or those boys that have the creepy porn collection and anime fettishes. And girls will have their list of famous boys that they tease their boyfriends with because they'll never have that body, that jawline, those eyebrows, those eyes, that hair, that much education and/or poise or be that funny and intriguing and talented. So we damage eachother's self esteem and collectively flatter celebrities who have the unfair advantage of plastic surgery, personal trainers, teams of psychologists and yes-men, financial means and emotional encouragement, the ability to travel wherever they want with no obligations, etc.
Or I'm taking it too seriously. Either way, I've fallen victim to one of these. But I won't dwell on that. I just want to examine a few of the common culprits that find their way into a girl's fantasy.
NOT Brad Pitt!! Yes, culprit #1. The ultimate cliche. Like being stuck with that song from Titanic as your prom theme. EVERYONE likes him. Every boy and girl that I've talked to likes him and/or wants to fuck him for different reasons. Katie in Fight Club. Brandon in Seven. Steve in everything he's seen him in. Even my MOM in Kalifornia. But I feel kinda bad for him. First I see him stuck married to the terminally figureless and boring and strange-nosed Jennifer Aniston. Now, supposedly he's with Angelina Jolie, who's lips were created the same day God invented bean-bag chairs.
Another one that I just don't get. Orlando Bloom. It looks like his face is trying to eat itself. His eyebrows often make him look like a clam trying to shut.
Generally, it takes a very "special" type of girl to have a crush on Vin Diesel and there's a very "special" fad of boys trying to look like him. Both groups are dirty and stupid, as he seems to be. And where's his chin?
Saved the best for last. Yeah, in case the icon or the other pictures of him that I keep snarking at didn't give it away, this is the guy that is stealing Katie from me and everyone seems to think he's the sexiest thing ever except me. Though I'll admit that his eyebrows are hot. And any comments that I am only perpetrating her interest in him with this picture can be directed to my ass. He's not as common as the other ones, but maybe that's part of the appeal.
Now that my computer and google.com thinks I'm gay, I'll go.
Oh yeah, before I forget, since it says to promote their site if I use the picture or something by all means, go to this fansite for pictures of someone who makes me want to move to Saudi Arabia and become a eunuch. I need a fucking cigarette.